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osmelendez
McNasty
Joined: 07 Apr 2012
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Posts: 367
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 Topic: Favorite river quotes! Posted: 27 May 2013 at 9:13am |
Let's be honest, kayakers say the funniest sh*t.
Like "CHUNDERED!" I can't even figure out what two words come together to make that one up. Is it 'churn' and 'thunder'?
It doesn't sound like something I want happening to me. However, recently I took a swim and got recirculated in a hole. I swear, those damn holes have it out for kayakers. Once they get their white claws on one it's freaking Full Nelson Suplex time, finished off with a drop kick to the face before it spits you out!
Is that chundered? Or is chundered when the same thing happens to you but you remain in your boat?
Does someone have a video of getting chundered?
My most favorite quote so far this year was from Chris W. as he's scouting his run down stout flows of the Class V/V+ stretch of Duckabush Creek and he points up the creek with a crazy look in his face and yells "There's some WHITE LIGHTENING in that creek boys!"
Let's hear some of those favorite quotes.
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water wacko
Master Poster
Team Jackson
Joined: 07 Nov 2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 2143
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 Posted: 27 May 2013 at 8:16pm |
You can only run a drop BLIND... once.
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"Don't ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive, and go do that, because what the world needs is people who have come alive." ~Howard Thurman
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jon!
Rock Bumper
Joined: 18 Oct 2010
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 47
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 Posted: 28 May 2013 at 9:50pm |
While tying down boats:"that ought to hold we're only going a little ways"
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franzhorner
PP Junkie
outdoors music woodwork
Joined: 01 Mar 2005
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 751
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 Posted: 28 May 2013 at 10:15pm |
I heard a new one this weekend. After scouting BD, Rib says, "you want to go truck and trailer?" - meaning our 2 boat float would go one right after the other....
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MORE RAIN PLEASE
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osmelendez
McNasty
Joined: 07 Apr 2012
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Posts: 367
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 Posted: 28 May 2013 at 11:37pm |
Lol! You be the truck, I'll be the trailer? What a quote.
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FLUID
WW Industry
Joined: 15 Jan 2007
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 276
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 Posted: 29 May 2013 at 12:58pm |
Chunderings
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oVNm98b8Tqc
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not-very-clever
Super Looper
Joined: 04 Jun 2008
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 152
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 Posted: 29 May 2013 at 3:00pm |
"the line will become apparent" love hearing that when scouting and cant see the line very well
that's such a sick vid chris! most of that is the good kind of carnage! folks are putting in an honest effort in those holes there, and pop out smiling (minus a few exceptions)
Edited by not-very-clever - 29 May 2013 at 3:22pm
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James
Admin
Sum Dum Guy
Joined: 31 Dec 2004
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 3598
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 Posted: 29 May 2013 at 3:58pm |
"If you aren't swimming you aren't pushing yourself hard enough" I always love hearing folks say that, don't agree, but I always chuckle when I hear it.
But still to this day my personal favorite has to be... "The solution to pollution is dilution"
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water wacko
Master Poster
Team Jackson
Joined: 07 Nov 2006
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Posts: 2143
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 Posted: 29 May 2013 at 5:00pm |
"It all flushes."
"It's just a pile of fluffy bunnies."
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"Don't ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive, and go do that, because what the world needs is people who have come alive." ~Howard Thurman
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SOPBOATER
McNasty
Joined: 29 Nov 2009
Location: United States
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 296
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 Posted: 29 May 2013 at 8:05pm |
I'll go first. if u hear me screaming don't go that way.
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WhiteWaterWheat
Paddler
Joined: 24 Oct 2010
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 83
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 Posted: 29 May 2013 at 9:04pm |
"Just follow me. 90% of the time, it works everytime!"
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You only get the chance to run a drop blind once.
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not-very-clever
Super Looper
Joined: 04 Jun 2008
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 152
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 Posted: 29 May 2013 at 9:12pm |
65% of statistics are made up on the spot
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ThrowYaMittsUp
Tricky Woo
Joined: 08 Jul 2008
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Posts: 205
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 Posted: 30 May 2013 at 8:13am |
From a legendary Grand Canyon boatman:
"Hey Nels, whats the line here?"
"You're just gonna f it up anyway......Go in there and get pounded!"
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"Call on God, but row away from the rocks." ~H.S. Thompson
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ThrowYaMittsUp
Tricky Woo
Joined: 08 Jul 2008
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Posts: 205
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 Posted: 30 May 2013 at 8:17am |
Also, not a river quote but it works:
"I'd keep playing. I don't think the heavy stuff's gonna come down for quite awhile."
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"Call on God, but row away from the rocks." ~H.S. Thompson
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JayB
Big Boofer
Joined: 21 Feb 2005
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 505
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 Posted: 30 May 2013 at 10:13am |
These are from a rafting companies overview of Boulder Drop with tips for swimmers. I especially like this line:
"Regardless of where the river washes you, stay positive
and enjoy the zen of the sublime. Terrifying, awe-inspiring, indifferent to your
suffering, the Skykomish rolls along"
-"It is useless to struggle here; enjoy the Zen of the sublime."
-"You will spend quality time totally submerged. Do not fear this repeated dunking. You
will be just fine if you let the adrenaline still the pain of the cold water, as you turn
your mind to strategic breathing."\
-"Just relax until the river washes you below these obstacles."
For folks swimming at House Rocks:
-"Relax and get out your E-ticket: here comes the real whitewater swim."
http://www.riverexpeditions.com/boulder2.htm
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-Jay
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JayB
Big Boofer
Joined: 21 Feb 2005
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Posts: 505
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 Posted: 30 May 2013 at 10:15am |
Advice shouted to a guy trying to fight his way out of a wicked retentive hole after many attempts to paddle out of it.
"JUST ACCEPT IT! JUUUUUST ACCEPT IT, FRIEND!"
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-Jay
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JD_G
Splat Wheeler
Joined: 23 Apr 2010
Location: United States
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 138
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 Posted: 30 May 2013 at 9:38pm |
Hey ThrowYaMittsUp.....is "Nel" by chance "Nelbert"? Also boated for Chilkat Guides in AK.
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JoesKayak
Rio Banditos
Joined: 07 Nov 2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1254
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 Posted: 30 May 2013 at 9:46pm |
Me: What's this rapid up ahead Fish: Oh, it's nothing. Read and run IV- Me: Right. I'm scouting.
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JoesKayak
Rio Banditos
Joined: 07 Nov 2006
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Posts: 1254
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 Posted: 30 May 2013 at 10:06pm |
More fun stuff I've heard over the years.... names withheld to protect the guilty. "Walled in, must run class I+" "Dude, where's my boat?" (after arriving at a put-in to discover it had blown off) "It's right around this bend" "you said that 10 bends ago." "when do we get to the put out?"... "you mean take-out? put out is something else altogether." "I came. I saw. I portaged." "If I swim, rescue beer first, boat 2nd, me last." "Should we tell him about the hole?" "Did anyone tell you your first time?" "The good news is you'll probably flush. The bad news is it might not happen until July." "I only have 2 paddle commands. '%@$&ing PADDLE!' and 'NO! NOT THAT WAY' " and one of my favorite lines I've heard from literally hundreds of people over the years who have come up to me at a put in on a sunny day while I'm dressed in full gear and rigging up a boat... "So, you guys going down the river?"
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osmelendez
McNasty
Joined: 07 Apr 2012
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 367
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 Posted: 30 May 2013 at 10:15pm |
Quote... "I ain't runnin' that sh*t."
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osmelendez
McNasty
Joined: 07 Apr 2012
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Posts: 367
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 Posted: 30 May 2013 at 10:24pm |
By the way @JoesKayak... freaking hilarious contribution.
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PanchosPigTaxi
Paddler
Joined: 27 Jan 2011
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Posts: 53
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 Posted: 31 May 2013 at 12:28am |
"Sideways happens"
Edited by PanchosPigTaxi - 31 May 2013 at 12:29am
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James
Admin
Sum Dum Guy
Joined: 31 Dec 2004
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 3598
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 Posted: 31 May 2013 at 10:58am |
Ok who went into the admin area and changed my name to say Jiminy Creek-it?
Better question who removed the Facebook filter, I really enjoyed knowing we did not support the endless evil that is facebook....
but whatevs...
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James
Admin
Sum Dum Guy
Joined: 31 Dec 2004
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 3598
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 Posted: 31 May 2013 at 11:27am |
Filter doesn't run on the read from every word, only on the insert into the database. The read from the db doesn't run through the filter.
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JoesKayak
Rio Banditos
Joined: 07 Nov 2006
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Posts: 1254
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 Posted: 31 May 2013 at 11:34am |
Originally posted by slickhorn
dang, joe, those bring back some great memories lol
first time we elf'd the LW, got to the takeout, asked the guy taking out how it was. We were gripped, step up run, none of us had seen it before, except one guy 10 years before.
Guy doesn't even look at us as he walks by with his boat. "Rocks and water, man. Rocks and water."
Which was true, but perhaps neglected to mention the wood!
Fish telling Jiminy Creek-it Mole he could run anything in an IK Jiminy Creek-it could kayak was another good line. that ended up being the Ashlu mine run after an all night downpour. And of course, Fish totally backed it up ...
"Where's my green nalgene!?!"
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